Keywords that led to people visiting my blog

This is very interesting.. people all the way from china (www.google.cn) visited my blog by searching the keywords ...
- when a women didnt love you


** hehe.. yeah.. welcome!! to all those visiting from:
- San Antonio, Texas, USA
- Ho Chi Ming City, Vietnam
- Bangkok, Thailand
- Beijing, China
- Hong Kong, China
- Brisbane, Australia
- and... Aucklanders... New Zealand.

Stagecoach refuses to apologise for the death of a chinese man

Oct 24, 2007 7:03 PM

The Stagecoach bus company has made a big payout to the family of a man who died after apparently being hit by one of its buses, but it has not apologised. Rongfa Jiang's family now plans to take legal action against the bus company, as they question the punishment given to the driver.

Jiang died from severe head injuries after being allegedly swiped from the footpath by a bus.

The driver was sentenced to 40 hours of community service for failing to stop and ascertain injury.

Hao Jiang, the victim's son says people who are cruel to animals in New Zealand get more punishment than the bus driver.

"It appears that in New Zealand the life of a China man is worth less than a dog," he says.

The family's lawyer, Frank Deliu, says the family all along has asked for a more through investigation.

"There were supposedly eight other witnesses on the bus that were never found. So police have said all along they don't have the key witness to pinpoint to show the driver knew what had happened."

On Wednesday morning, the head of Stagecoach arrived with a substantial cheque, enough to cover the family's living costs for most of this year.

But there has been no apology from Stagecoach and there will not be. While the company says it has enormous sympathy for the Jiang family, it says the bus driver involved had never been found accountable for the death by police or by the courts.

That's not good enough for Rongfa Jiang's widow who wants her lawyers to make a diplomatic protest to the Chinese government.

"She now feels justice hasn't been done, so she's going back to her country to see what other support she can get," says Deliu.

"If this was simply an unavoidable accident, I could accept my fate. But this was much more than that. The pain of the death of my father is even greater because no-one in New Zealand cares enough," says Hao Jiang.

Legal action is also planned against Stagecoach. The driver himself is still working for the company, but not driving buses.

Letting go, because you love them

Sometimes love is a test of whether we’d want the pleasure of our loved ones company, vs. we’d want for them whats important for them for their happiness. At this test of love, most choose what they’d want their lover do . I consider this a sign that they haven’t [yet] crossed over into a bond where they accept their lover as themselves, instead they still consider themselves as themselves and their lover as their lover!

Care for a loved one is in granting them their freedom to live their life according to what matters them the most, not according to what you think should:
"Love is in letting go for their happiness/growth/safety, not in our need for their companionship/agreement/compliance."

Here’s a story to illustrate this point:

Long long ago, there lived a wise, noble and fair man. People of that region considered he could solve any problem and often sought his advice. This day was unique, because instead of his advice they awaited his judgement.

Two women were brought to him who had a dispute over one baby. Each claimed the baby was theirs. At that time, there was no means to find out whose baby it was, as the government didn’t keep track of the births, their parents or had a DNA test. Children would grow up to recognize their parents, but in this case the baby was too small to even do that.

The wiseman thought for a while and said to the two women, “Let us find out whose baby it is by having a match. Each of you two hold one side each of the baby, and let there be a tug of war to pull the baby towards yourself. The one who wins would have proved their maternal love!”

So the tug-of-war began, while the people watched to know the result. The baby wailed loudly. Within a matter of moments one of the women let go of her side. Everyone knew the winner was clearly the one who now had the baby.

However, the wiseman ordered the woman who had won this tug-of-war competition to hand over the baby to its real mother. He continued, “The real mother let the baby go because she could bear the pain, suffering and unhappiness of one she loved. You didn’t feel the same way because you wanted the baby more than the baby’s happiness or safety itself – had you been the mother you’d have just know this.”

The people were once again thankful to the wiseman, for justice had prevailed.

Moral: The fact that you let go doesn’t say anything about how much you love someone. Whether it was for their benefit or for yours, instead, tells how much you love them!

Similarily, a love for humanity is demonstrated not by how you make them follow you or your revered [imaginary] leader/ideals; it is demonstrated by how you let them be by respecting their “individual freedom”. "Live and let live" is a motto that is derived from giving others their space because you care for their will and welfare. Had you wanted yours, the motto would’ve instead just been “Just let me live [no matter what I do]”. Unfortunately, a majority of us care only as far as our skin feels – to be able to live irrespective of whether others have what they themselves have, or not.

A Father’s Prayer

Prayer By: General Douglas MacArthur (1880-1964) who was United states' last five-star general. His fierce command of many campaigns in WWI, WWII, and Korea distinguished him as a true patriot. But MacArthur was also a man of prayer. "A Father's Prayer," written by the general during the early days of the desperate campaigns in the Far East in WWII; is a model for every father today.


麥克阿瑟元帥為儿子的祈禱

主啊! 求你塑造我的儿子，使他夠堅強到能認識自己的軟弱；夠勇敢到能面對懼怕；在誠實的失敗中，毫不气餒；在胜利中，仍保持謙遜溫和。

懇求塑造我的儿子，不致空有幻想而缺乏行動，引導他認識你，同時又知道認識自己乃是真知識的基石。我祈禱，愿你引導他，不求安逸，舒适，相反的，經過壓力艱難和挑戰，學習在風暴中挺身站立，學會怜恤那些在重壓之下失敗的人。

求你塑造我的儿子，心地清洁，目標遠大；使他在指揮別人之前，先懂得駕馭自己；永不忘記過去的教訓，又能伸展人未來的理想。當他擁有以上的一切，我還要祈求，賜他足夠的幽默感，使他能認真嚴肅，却不致過份苛求自己。懇求賜他謙卑，使他永遠牢記，真偉大中的平凡，真智慧中的開明，真勇力中的溫柔。

如此，我這做父親的，才敢低聲說：“我沒有虛度此生”。


麥克阿瑟元帥


A Father’s Prayer

Build me a son, O Lord, who will be strong enough to know when he is weak, and brave enough to face himself when he is afraid; one who will be proud and unbending in honest defeat, and humble and gentle in victory. Build me a son whose wishbone will not be where his backbone should be; a son who will know Thee and that to know himself is the foundation stone of knowledge.

Lead him I pray, not in the path of ease and comfort, but under the stress and spur of difficulties and challenge. Here let him learn to stand up in the storm; here let him learn compassion for those who fail. Build me a son whose heart will be clear, whose goal will be high; a son who will master himself before he seeks to master other men; one who will learn to laugh, yet never forget how to weep; one who will reach into the future, yet never forget the past.

And after all these things are his, add, I pray, enough of a sense of humor, so that he may always be serious, yet never take himself too seriously. Give him humility, so that he may always remember the simplicity of true greatness, the open mind of true wisdom, the meekness of true strength.

Then, I, his father, will dare to whisper, have not lived in vain.

Amen.

婚前男人的十大经典谎言

　　谎言一：我未婚。


　　谎言二：你有一双世上最美的眼睛。


　　谎言三：从来没有人带给我这种感觉。


　　谎言四：我不会做出任何伤害你的事。


　　谎言五：你是我的唯一。


　　谎言六：我永远不会骗你的。


　　谎言七：自从我们分手后我一直是一个人过日子。


　　谎言八：自从我跟她分手后，我就没有再见过她了。


　　谎言九：只要你喜欢，多少钱都不在乎。


　　谎言十：我爱你（这是令女人最招架不住的一句）！

CNN: Heart Disease induced by bad relationships

Study: Bad relationships could damage heart

• Story Highlights
• Study: Bad personal relationships can raise heart disease risk
  
• Increased stress is probably the key factor
  
• Previous studies linked health problems with being single
  
• Current research focused more on quality of important relationships
  

CHICAGO, Illinois (AP) -- A lousy marriage might literally make you sick.

Marital strife and other bad personal relationships can raise your risk for heart disease, researchers reported Monday.

What it likely boils down to is stress -- a well-known contributor to health problems, as well as a potential byproduct of troubled relationships, the scientists said.

In a study of 9,011 British civil servants, most of them married, those with the worst close relationships were 34 percent more likely to have heart attacks or other heart trouble during 12 years of follow-up than those with good relationships. That included partners, close relatives and friends.

The study, in Monday's Archives of Internal Medicine, follows previous research that has linked health problems with being single and having few close relationships. In the new study, researchers focused more on the quality of marriage and other important relationships.

"What we add here is that, 'OK, being married is in general good, but be careful about the kind of person you have married.' The quality of the relationship matters," said lead author Roberto De Vogli, a researcher with University College in London.

De Vogli said his research team is doing tests to see whether study participants with bad relationships have any biological evidence of stress that could contribute to heart disease. That includes inflammation and elevated levels of stress hormones.

Another recent study also looked at quality of relationships but had different results. There was no association between marital woes in general and risks for heart disease or early death. But it did find, over a 10-year follow-up, that women who keep silent during marital arguments had an increased risk of dying compared with wives who expressed their feelings during fights. What appeared to matter more for men was just being married; married men were less likely to die during the follow-up than single men.

That study, of nearly 4,000 men and women, was published online in July in the journal Psychosomatic Medicine.

In De Vogli's study, men and women with bad relationships faced equal risks. Volunteers filled out questionnaires asking them to rate the person to whom they felt closest on several measures. These included questions about to what extent does that person "give you worries, problems and stress?"

They also were asked about whether they felt they could confide in that person, or whether talking with that person made them feel worse.

Over the following 12 years, 589 participants had heart attacks or other heart problems. Those with the highest negative scores on the questionnaire had the highest risks, even taking into account other factors related to heart disease such as obesity, high blood pressure and smoking.

James Coyne, a University of Pennsylvania psychology professor who also has examined the health impact of social relationships, said De Vogli's results "make intuitive sense." But he said the study found only a weak association that doesn't prove bad relationships can cause heart disease.

"It is still not clear what to recommend," Coyne said.

"Do we tell people who have negative relationships to get therapy? They may have other reasons to do so, but I see no basis for them doing so only to avoid a heart attack," Coyne said.

Ending a bad marriage is not necessarily the answer either, he said, given evidence that being unmarried also could be a risk.

Copyright 2007 The Associated Press. All rights reserved.This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed.

Achmed the dead terrorist!